d When you're young and so in love as we d
d And bewildered by the world we see d
d Why do people hurt us so? d
d Only those in love will know d
d What a town without pity can do d
d If we stop to gaze upon a star d
d People talk about how bad we are d
d Ours is not an easy age, we're like tigers in a cage d
d What a town without pity can do d
d Though the young have problems d
d Many problems d
d We need an understanding heart d
d Why don't they help us, try to help us d
d Before this Clay and granite planet falls apart? d
d Take these eager lips and hold me fast d
d I'm afraid this kind of joy can't last d
d How can we keep love alive, how can anything survive d
d When these little minds tear you in two? d
d What a town without pity can do d
d How can we keep love alive, how can anything survive d
d When these little minds tear you in two? d
d What a town without pity can do d
d No, it isn't very pretty d
d What a town without pity can do d
What? Yeah, I'll see you down there later.
I just gotta finish some stuff I'm writing.
Yeah. Ok. Bye.
Sooze? Yeah. So did you tell him that we couldn't afford
20 bucks a ticket
and why didn't he put us on the comp list?
No, no, there's always a comp list.
All right.
Well, so, then, just get your mother's car
and maybe we'll all go do something.
Yeah. I gotta get off.
Ok. Bye.
Hey, Frankie! Hey, what are you doing?
Sleeping? What, at 6:00?
Sleep when you are dead.
Hey, man, I just got off work.
Why don't you meet me at the corner?
So? Put on some clothes and come down, man. Yeah.
Yeah, yeah, I wanna see you, man.
All right.
Yeah.
Hey, why don't you bring that pot you just bought?
What?
Yeah... You, man.
Later.
d Crush me d
d Come and work me over d
d Crush me d
d Now, there's an idea d
d We're gonna die now d
d Kiss everyone... d
I'm going out later.
No car.
The... Not?
You know the... Not.
Don't swear. It's impolite.
We are truly thrilled to bring you this next item,
and it's a host-value special.
It's the spiral relaxation lamp.
I personally bought one of these for a very good friend of mine
and ended up falling in love with it.
I found myself mesmerized by watching the balls.
That's why I suggest that if you're going to buy one,
you buy maybe 2 or 3.
It started with a traffic argument,
escalated to the firing of an illegally carried
concealed handgun,
ending with the death of the man it was aimed at.
Gordon Riedhale claimed he couldn't escape an attacker
who was punching him in the head.
Concealed carry instructors say it's that fear of mortal danger
that gave Hale the legal right to pull the trigger.
Just depends on the cup capacity.
What size is that?
55,000.
Marlboros, chief. Hard pack.
In that case, you need a heavy-duty filter.
2.50.
2.50? They go up?
Always 2.50, my friend.
What that means is,
every armed licensee faced with danger
must make a split-second judgment call.
Timmy boy.
Chief!
Shoots and...
Aw, time's running out.
3, 2, 1... No good!
Yeah!!
Hey. Hey, 7.20.
7.20.
What?
7.20.
I gave it to you.
He paid you, man.
You owe me 20 cents. Come on, 7.20.
7.20!
Yo, you're spittin' rice all over us.
God.
Here's 25 cents.
That guy should cut down on his caffeine intake.
Needs some pizza in his diet.
I don't think I like that guy's attitude at all.
Hey, you know what? Take off the blades.
I mean it. I'm gonna break your... legs.
You're a fascist, man.
Take 'em off!
Neo-fascist.
Buff, sit.
You know what I mean, though?
Somebody ought to crack that guy
with a baseball bat.
Yeah, well, he's from a third-world country.
He doesn't have it easy.
What? What the... do you know about the third world?
You been there?
No? No. Well, I have.
Live like sardines in a can over there.
You know, everything stinks. It's true.
There's no, you know, law,
no order, no nothing.
Ass... come over here,
they think it's gonna be the same.
But he's a human being. You can give him that much.
Actually, the only thing I gotta give that guy
is a one-way ticket back to greaseball land.
Yeah, well, that pizza could feed a family of 4 in Turkey
or India or wherever the... He comes from.
Yeah? How would you ship it there, man?
Federal Express?
By the time it got there,
it'd be way cold and coagulated...
Total waste,
cheese would be stuck to the cardboard.
Buff, that slice is the difference
between life and death for some half-dead Bangladeshi.
Yo, you're gettin' me all upset here.
You should get upset.
Everyone should get upset.
When... when Hitler was greasing the Jews,
people were saying,
"don't get me upset. You're bumming me out."
It's my duty as a human being to be pissed off.
Jesus Christ, nothing makes a difference
in the first place.
Nothing ever changes, man.
50 years from now, we're all gonna be dead,
and there'll be new people standing here,
drinking beer, eating pizza,
bitching and moaning about the price of oreos,
and they won't even know we were ever here,
and then 50 years after that,
those suckers will be dust and bones,
and there will be all these generations of suckers
tryin' to figure out what the... they're doing
on this... planet, and they'll all be full of...
It's all so... futile.
If it's all so... futile, what the...
Are you so... upset about, ...head?
Because I'm alienated.
How do you like orgasms?!
Yeah!
Hey, I'm at work yesterday,
comes in,
orders a 12-inch pie with extra cheese,
so, I ask her if she wanted me to, like, carry that out
to her car for her.
Right?
Is obviously in heat,
says, "yes, right away."
So, I carry the pie out to her car,
we smoke a Jay,
she... me,
we eat the pizza, I chase it with the beer.
Smoke-babe-slice-brew!
All 4 bases! Home run, man!
Buff, your ability to fantasize
is only exceeded by your ability to lie.
Untrue, Jeffster. I think that...
Hey, it's me.
2 weeks ago we attended a concert
where I... 2 girls...
This is the ultimate liar of liars.
And... your... mom.
Well, I'm here. Where are you?
Where are you who?
No, no, no.
I don't want to be stuck with the guy when he gets here.
Stuck... who? What guy?
Shut up. Don't do that, man.
Look, you can't be out here all night tonight, ok?
Hey, we're just havin' a conversation!
This is private property, my friend.
Come on, man.
Hey, don't tell us about private property.
This is America, my friend.
Look, look, look, you gotta go now, ok?
The customers complain.
We're your customers! We're not complaining!
Please!
You don't need to sit next to me right now.
Who were you talking to?
Nobody. Sooze.
Stuck with what guy?
What?
You said you didn't want to get stuck
with some guy. What guy?
Nobody. It's, it's my birthday this week,
and Sooze's brother might come by
to wish me a Happy Birthday.
It's your birthday?
Yeah.
Well, ...!
Happy... Birthday! Happy Birthday!
Don't do that, man.
Is Sooze around?
Yeah, she should be comin' by.
What'd she say? Is Pony comin'?
I don't know.
Want a beer? Pony?
No, thanks. I don't drink.
Well, what'd she say?
I mean, did she talk to him?
I... I... don't...
Pony? What's a "Pony"?
You mean the geek who played the folk music
at the senior prom?
What's that guy's name?
Neil Moynihan?
Pony's band... Dreamgirls...
Been on the road opening for midnight hore.
Stadiums, man.
Wait, so Pony's comin' by here?
Didn't you see their video on MTV?
No. I shot my TV.
But, so, Pony's comin' by here... the corner?
He's around, and, you know,
maybe he's comin' by.
Sooze told him to come by
and hang out,
whatever... It's no big deal.
Me, him, and Sooze are gonna...
No, well, you wanted to get together
with your close friend Pony the rock star.
I understand.
Do you... you want us to... To leave?
No, we were just gonna go someplace
or something.
We are?
All right, she told him to meet us here...
Pony's comin' here to the corner?
Yeah, no, it wasn't even my idea.
Jeff, Jeff, if you want to be alone with Pony,
you know, that's... That's fine with us.
Sooze wants to see him.
Well, you know, I want to... See him.
I gotta know.
I gotta know what it's like to be on MTV.
Yeah, we all want to see him, so when's he comin'?
Yeah, when's he comin'?
I don't know. Later.
I don't know.
Yes!
God, I haven't seen you all day.
You could've come over.
I know. I know. I know.
Trim it!
I hate that.
Sorry.
Let's go back to the van right now.
No, I'm not going to the van. It's so gross.
Come on. I'm gonna do my performance for everyone.
Ok, so maybe later.
Jesus.
Oliver Stone!
Bill Clinton!
Howard Stern!
Michael Bolton!
O.J. Simpson!
Pope John Paul.
My dad.
All the men. All the men.
All..The men!
Bang your head. Blow your nose.
Run down the street. Suck a hose.
Chew my lips. Eat some...
Eat a stick of dynamite and blow yourself to bits.
Shut your mouth. Go away.
Drink my piss. Have a nice day.
I hope you cry and never doubt.
I hope you die with blood in your mouth.
I hope your lies will no more shout
what's in my eyes, what's in your snout!
You're a pig! I know that's true!
I dance your jig!
You!
So...
It was really great.
It was ok? Yeah.
What did you guys think?
Slides go with it.
Behind me.
I'm making these slides out of these old pictures
and paintings and stuff.
Is that supposed to be about me?
No.
Yes.
It's called "burger manifesto, part I:"
"The dialectical exposition
of testosterone."
Isn't that a great title?
Why is everything about you, Jeff?
No, not... not everything. This.
I am the man in your life.
Man?
Yeah, man, male, significant other...
Whatever the... I am.
It's a piece.
You're sure as to hell right about that.
I'm not doing it anywhere, Jeff.
It's just a part of my application
to the school of visual arts.
In New York.
You know people there?
I'm just gonna go.
Figure the worst I can do is starve to death.
"The worst I can do is starve to death."
Listen to you.
I don't want to hear it anymore.
No, no, no. You know why?
You're packing your bags,
you're jumping into the unknown
because some conceptual artist
who teaches at a community college
is having a midlife crisis,
and he wants to sleep with some girl
half his age,
so he tells you you have talent...
Mr. Brooks has had shows in New York, Jeff.
He's been reviewed in art forum.
I think he knows.
Well, then,
you'd better listen to him, shouldn't you?
Well, ...!
Might as well not do anything.
Let's just stick our thumbs up our asses and twirl.
Yes, that's right. You know what, honey?
You should go to New York. You should go...
Go show 'em.
They need your unique point of view.
At least I have point of view, you know?
I stand for something,
and I'm trying to communicate something.
What are you trying to communicate? Tell us.
So you can give me more ...?
No, no. It's an honest question.
What are you tryin' to communicate?
I'm tryin' to communicate
how I feel, Jeff...
You know, raise consciousness,
make people think for a change.
"Burger manifesto, part I"
is gonna make people think.
Yes, you ass... About what?
About things that are important to me.
Like what?
Sexual politics, racism,
the environment,
the military-industrial complex...
Racism? You don't even know anybody who's black.
Of course I do.
Name one.
God, Karen Johnson.
One!
You are completely missing the point!
You know, I'm talking about idealism.
Responsibility, progress.
Yes. No, idealism
is guilty middle-class bull...
No, sweetie, cynicism is bull...
No, no. I'm not being cynical, I'm being honest.
But do you stand for anything?
Yes, I stand for...
What? What do you stand for?
I stand for honesty!
I stand for some level of truth.
Yeah, right! Yeah, right!
Can I talk here? Let me talk!
You know, all you know is what's good for you.
Can I talk?
Typical male.
Tim, he listens to you.
Do you think it's a good idea? Seriously.
Seriously?
It's a great idea.
Thank you.
See? He did it.
He left.
I did.
I split, man.
I expanded my horizons,
you know, served my country.
Saw the world, you know.
I gained wisdom, and now I'm back, baby,
back from the road. Me and Jack Kerouac.
I can't wait till Pony gets here, you know?
Have a conversation with a human being.
Well, if you love him so much,
why didn't you go see him play?
Because you didn't want to go.
Like I'm gonna pay 20 bucks
to see Neil Moynihan
in some band that I helped start.
Ok, well, you know, he's always been a nice guy,
and I like him.
He's a geek.
Hey, I've been, makin' these tapes,
videotapes.
I ripped off a camcorder up at the mall.
I thought, you know, it could be somethin' that I do,
be a video artist, you know?
Ladies and gentlemen, Buff:
The post-modern idiot savant.
He will outdo us all.
Aaigh! Aaigh!
It's safe. Come on.
Hey.
That's it.
That's it! Yeah! I'm calling the police.
Why? We're just standing here.
Look, you're trespassing.
Hey, call the cops.
Call... call 'em right now, man.
Hey, maybe my cousin Jerry will show up.
He'll definitely take your word over mine.
You tell him about the trespassing,
I'll tell him about how you sell beer to minors.
I'm not joking around now, ok? Come on.
Let's go. Let's go.
We're just standing here.
Look, just go and stand someplace else, ok?
You stand someplace else, man.
You stand someplace else.
This is our corner.
You don't... Own it.
Yes, I do.
My family owns it. It's ours.
You don't belong here.
No, you don't belong here.
We were here before you.
Why don't you go back to where you came from?
Hey, Tim...
No, see, sweetheart,
you dot want to stand up for this parasite,
'cause I can... Smell him from here.
You know what? 2 words, man: "Roll-on."
Yeah, yeah...
You sell it right here.
What are you? Drunk. Bum.
Yeah, you are good for nothing.
You just, hang around...
On my property.
The hare krishna's callin' me a drunk.
Hey, listen, pal, you want us to go?
Yeah, please, go. Come on.
Make a move...
Greasecake.
Towel head.
Hey, Tim, you know what? You win.
Drunk.
You have the largest penis.
Can we go, please?
No, let 'em fight! The dude wants it!
No! Wait a minute! This is ridiculous!
Pakeesa...
It's ok. Come on.
Come on.
Come on. They're just joking around.
Yeah, we're just screwin' around,
like Muhammad said.
Can't take a joke, man?
Hey, hope you got a permit for that, mama!
We're sorry, ok? We're gonna go.
Hey, you're gonna regret this.
Come on, Jeff.
Her. Let's go find some...
Hey, I'm sorry about that.
It was just a misunderstanding.
He was upset about something,
and he took it out on you,
and I'm sorry.
I seriously doubt Pony's gonna be in a limo.
That's the rock star thing.
No.
I'll bet you he has a babe with him
right out of a triple-x video, man...
Pony, come on, dude, do me!
Buff. Buff.
Sorry. Buff.
Jesus Christ.
Want to bet he's with a girl?
No, he's not with a girl.
All right.
My God, Pony, it's so huge.
You know what?
He probably gets bored with all that...
Yeah. Yeah.
Wait. How do you figure... That?
I'd get bored.
I wouldn't.
If I were ever in his shoes,
every morning, I'd get up singing, man.
I'd do my workout, take a shower,
followed by a hearty breakfast...
Steak and eggs,
washed down with a pot of hot coffee,
six-pack of coors light.
Then I'd order my bodyguard
to go find my babe,
who would appear decked out
in her all-black-leather Victoria's secret
custom-made bodysuit.
So, I'd, like, have to chew off all her clothes
until she was completely nude.
Except she'd have these amazing dragon tattoos
all over her body
and pierced nipples with little gold peace signs
hanging from 'em.
Then she'd take out this half ounce of blow
and snap out a few mongo lines,
vaporize a few million brain cells,
screw for about an hour, then spend the rest
of the morning trashed, watching...
Gilligan.
That sounds so great, man. Yes! Yes.
Hey, what would you do in the afternoon?
More of the same.
Yeah, you just keep doing the same thing
all the time, around and around the clock.
With an occasional burger or slice thrown in
for vitamins and energy.
Man, instead of watching gilligan, we watch...
Captain Kirk.
That sounds so depressing.
Come on, man. Tell me you wouldn't love it.
No. I'm not saying I wouldn't love it.
No.
I'm saying after a while it'd wear thin.
Yeah, a long while.
A long, long while.
Watch out for the tree.
A long, long, long, long while.
Ok.
A long, long, long...
Ok.
Hey, Tim, hold up.
It was a racial incident.
It was just something that got out of hand.
Did anyone get hurt?
It got that close.
Ok, but nothing happened. Believe me.
If I thought something really bad was gonna happen,
I would've done something.
Yeah?
Yeah.
Ok, what would you have done?
I would've stopped it.
How?
I don't know. I would've done something.
This is kind of hypothetical, isn't it?
This place is so stupid.
I can't believe we're sitting here
in this mosh pit of consumerism
with all these people eating
their chunks of dead flesh.
Jeff... Jeff!
Like... robots. Look at those kids right there.
Jeff.
You know, I was talking to Mr. Brooks yesterday.
He has this friend in New York
who wants to sublet his apartment
for 650 a month.
I could swing that.
650.
Sooze... What?
Did it ever occur to you
that I might have some feelings
about you moving to New York?
What feelings?
Us.
Of course.
And?
Come with me.
No.
No, see, that's not what I'm saying.
I'm say... i could go to New York if I wanted to,
but what's the point?
So I can learn how to order a cappuccino?
So I could get mugged by some crackhead?
So I could see homeless people up close and personal?
So what do you want to do?
Nothing.
No one does nothing, Jeff.
Ok, well, then I'm gonna break new ground.
New ground?
Taking one community college course
on the history of Nicaragua
while barely holding a job packing boxes?
Ok, look, my job is not who I am.
I don't need that.
Why? What's your goal? Status? Money?
Getting your picture on the cover
of some glossy magazine?
My goal is to make art.
So why can't you do that here?
What's wrong with here?
Why is somewhere else better?
Why should I stay here, Jeff?
So we could sit on the corner
and watch the lights change
while you bitch about Burnfield?
No...
So I can spend the rest of my life
guessing what it would be like
to be a real artist?
No...
So you and I can... While your parents
are out having dinner at the sizzler?
What are we doing, Jeff...
You and me?
I don't know.
Hey. Great game Friday.
KickedHolbrook's ass?
Missed it. Get a fifth of old crow?
Just one?
Yeah.
Hey.
You seen the new guy we got... beavers?
The guy can pass.
Hey, I've been meaning to ask you...
Do you remember that game against north reading
when you passed to Pierce and he dropped the ball?
What do you think happened?
Do you think, like, he wasn't there or you were short?
I don't... I don't remember.
What do I owe you?
11.25.
Hey!
Yeah!
Great.
d In my head, head d
d I'm really tall d
d My eyes are big, not small d
d Hair flows down my back d
d Down straight down my back d
d In my heart, heart d
d I'm a star d
d Bigger than... d
Hey.
Do you have a cigarette?
No. I quit.
Hey, you said you did a video?
Yep.
What's it about?
It's really not about anything.
Well, what's on it?
A cloud.
A cloud?
Yeah.
There was this cloud,
and I videotaped it.
I was doing 'shrooms and saw this cloud.
It looks excellent on tape.
The video is like my head
and... and everything, you know,
is like... like in there that I see.
You know?
Plus I'm gonna come down here one night,
walk around inside the circle a
with a camera and tape...
That's amazing.
Wish I could see it.
You can see it.
Whenever you want.
Hey...
Don't you, work at a hospital or something?
Yeah. I'm a nurse's aide at mercy.
You're a nurse?
No. I, you know, I help 'em out.
I empty bedpans and bring 'em lunch...
That kind of thing.
Any gunshot victims?
Some of 'em,
but it's mostly just strokes and...
I mean, most of them just sleep all the time
and get kind of yellow.
Usually they die if they're, you know, really yellow.
No. It's not.
I mean, they're not all totally in a coma.
I mean, they know when I'm helping them.
Hey, what are you doing now?
Right now?
Yeah.
I don't know.
Waiting, I guess.
You know?
Do you want to go to the van?
Now?
Yeah, we could hang out, smoke a doob...
I don't smoke doobs,
and I don't really hang out.
But I'll go back.
Ok.
Ok. Whatever you want.
Hey, Pony.
Hey, man.
Jeff.
How you doing?
Good, man.
The corner...
I mean, nothing's changed.
You've only been gone for a year, man.
Is that your limo?
Yeah. Yeah.
Yeah. The record company,
they make me use it, you know?
I mean, it's dumb. I know it.
No, it's not... Hey.
The driver knows Billy Idol.
Yeah, I saw your album at Musicland
up at the mall.
Yeah. Yeah.
We're starting to get good placement,
like that, you know?
Yeah.
We sold, like, over 90,000 units,
and.. And Danny says
that we're gonna get a gold record.
Yeah.
A gold record, man. That's great.
So, you're... You're, like,
living the wild life now?
Come on. Nah.
Rock star, fame, fortune...
Sex.
Yeah. Chicks.
Nah, man, you know, it's hard work, you know?
Yeah.
The road's hell, you know?
I mean, airport, hotel, show.
And airport, hotel, show. Airport, hotel, show.
I mean, ..., man, you know?
You still living at your mom's?
Yeah. Yeah, I just crash there.
Most nights I'm just, you know, out.
Yeah, it sounds cool. Great.
He says we got to be at the radio station at 7 A.M.
Can you handle that?
Sure. Great.
Hi. I'm Erica.
Erica, this is my friend Jeff.
Hi, Jeff. Nice to meet you.
Jeff, Erica.
God. It's so amazing to be back home.
Yeah.
I mean, we've been playing big places everywhere,
but when we did that sound check at the orpheum,
it suddenly hit me.
I'm playing the orpheum, you know?
I mean, the last time I played around here
was, the prom.
The prom.
That's funny.
Yeah.
Hey, I thought you guys were coming to the show, man?
Yeah. We were,
but, Sooze screwed up the tickets.
Man. We were pretty on tonight.
You were excellent tonight, Pony.
We were? Yeah.
It was a great show. You guys missed it.
Sorry.
So, how's college?
I dropped out.
I mean, you know, this semester,
I'm taking a class, you know, 3 nights a week,
but I'm just trying to think and...
Work on stuff, you know?
I've been doing some writing, though.
Short pieces, you know?
I love writing.
Anne Rice.
I love Anne Rice.
Short pieces?
You should try writing songs.
Yeah, I thought about that, actually.
No, man, I mean it. You're a good writer.
I remember those things that you'd write
in honors English.
Funny...
He wrote this thing about his... once,
and he read it in front of the whole class.
I'd love to read that.
Funny ..., man.
So you think I should?
What?
Write.
'Cause I have written some things.
Like songs?
Yeah. They could be songs.
Yeah. You should show 'em to me.
Really?
Yeah, really.
Now?
Yeah.
Great.
Yeah, maybe later.
Hey!
Pony! My God!
You showed up. My God!
Holy ...! Look at this car, man.
It's stupid, isn't it?
It's stupid.
No. No, it isn't. It's cool.
Look at you.
You look good.
Like your, you know, head's in a good place.
You... are you still doing your painting?
Sometimes, yeah.
You know, I started to do performances.
Yeah?
So, what's L.A. like?
It's pretty exciting.
Yeah? Yeah.
Like...
Well...
The other night,
our manager Danny took us to this restaurant,
and there was Sandra Bernhard.
No. She was just sitting there?
Yeah. Just sitting there eating a salad, you know.
That kind of thing happens all the time in L.A.
It's, you know.
I met Johnny Depp.
You did?! I love him.
Yeah, you know,
I'm thinking of moving to New York.
New York?
Yeah. To go to school and, you know, paint.
Performances, paint...
You have to go.
You always did such, you know, great work.
Aw...
I still have some of those drawings
that you'd do in study hall.
You do not! I do.
Jeff, don't you think Sooze should go to New York
and, you know...
Yeah, that would depend,
but, yeah, she should.
Really?
Hey!
Hey! Yes! Hey, Pony!
Man, great concert tonight!
You were there?
No, but I heard it was great, man.
Thanks.
Hey, Pony, this is my friend Bee-Bee.
Hey. How're you doing? Hi.
Nice to meet you.
So, tell us, man,
party time, trashin' hotel rooms,
babes around the clock?
Nah, nah. We don't have time for all that.
So, what about her?
Erica?
Erica's the publicist for the band.
Hi. I'm Erica.
Yeah, right. Hey, I'm Sooze.
Nice to meet you, Sooze.
Publicist.
Yeah, she, works for the record company
and takes care of interviews and, you know,
like that.
We were actually just doing an interview,
and Erica said she'd like to see Burnfield, so...
So, do you guys want to do something?
Go someplace or something like that?
So, we're all old friends of Pony's.
We go way back to our childhood.
Yeah, he's told me.
Burnfield, you know?
We all hear about Burnfield.
Does he tell you
about how Jeff, Pony started the band?
You were in the band?
Yeah.
Well, I helped start it,
but, you know...
Well, not exactly.
For a while.
Well, I mean, we jammed a couple of times.
You know, I mean, you play harmonica.
But that was before we were really a band, you know,
before Danny signed us.
Right.
Yeah, well, I came by
more than a couple times.
So you came by to see how the other half lives?
Well, here we are.
What do you think?
Pretty... Pathetic?
Kind of like one of those documentaries
on educational TV?
It's nice here. It's different.
Yeah, totally.
So, what do they interview you about?
Well, there's this benefit for Rwanda
we're gonna do,
and, you know, my songs,
where I get the ideas for them.
Yoknow, stuff like that.
Where do you get your ideas?
Leave him alone, Tim.
Excuse me. I'd like to know
where he gets his ideas.
Tim's jealous, you know?
He wants to have ideas, too.
Yeah. Yeah.
I'm jealous of MTV...
Who are named after animals.
Jeff!
You're not his publicist.
Sure I am. It's fun.
And you're, like, what else?
You mean his girlfriend?
That's one way of putting it.
Am I... Him?
Shit.
Pony, what would you say our relationship is?
Mother-daughter.
Pony and I are friends.
So, then, you're, like, available?
In what way?
A horizontal way.
Relax.
Why don't you Relax?
He's having verbal intercourse, Sooze.
No, he's not. He's objectifying her.
He's entertaining us at her expense.
It's ok. What's your name?
Buff. Buff is funny.
Buff is funny, ok? She likes Buff,
so why don't you whip shut the feminist hole?
Hey, why don't you swallow your...
And choke on it?
I forgot, it's not big enough.
So, Pony, where are you staying?
Are you staying at your mother's house?
No. No, that, you know,
that can be kind of a hassle,
so, I just stay at the four seasons.
It's easier.
Yeah, you know, I stay at the four seas.
It's ease.
That must be pretty nice there.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, yeah.
It's, you know,
it's a bed and hot water.
It does look good.
Yeah, so what do you guys do next?
I mean, what does your band do now?
We're gonna go in the studio,
and we're doing a new album.
Yeah?
Yeah, and I was thinking, Sooze,
you could do the cover.
You do not want me to do your cover.
I don't want you to do the cover.
I... i need you to do the cover.
You're not serious.
I'm always serious.
They'd never let me do what I want.
I get final approval. It's in my contract.
Would I get paid?
Yeah. We'd have to fly you out for meetings.
Yeah? Yeah.
God. That would be something I'd really want to do.
Wait. Just let me cash this.
Yeah.
How's the air force, Tim?
Not in the air force anymore, scuff.
So where are you?
I'm here.
Yeah, man. That's cool, dude.
It's really great.
Ok, now, you guys take care, ok?
Thanks.
Man, I feel good.
I feel good
'cause I'm hanging out with you guys, man.
You know? I mean, I forgot what it was like
to just hang out.
Yeah.
And you know why it's so good?
See, because, see, you guys are real.
No, man, I mean it.
You guys have a sense of humor.
You live your lives, you know?
It's simple, you know?
The guys on the road, I mean, the band...
All they talk about is scoring chicks.
And Danny... all Danny talks about is money.
Yeah, we're above all that.
See, I wrote something about all this.
It... it's a song about...
Well, play it, man.
Yeah, come on. Play it.
No, man. I can't.
Yeah. Come on.
Play it! Come on!
No, no, no, no, it's new.
I just started it.
I don't care.
I'm gonna drop it. I'm gonna drop it.
Don't drop the guitar, man.
Yes!
Free concert!
All right, Pony!
All right!
Yes!
Hey, unplugged Pony!
d I drove down the highway d
d There was a big jam d
d A family had died d
d There inside d
d Their minivan d
d There was a backup d
d It went on for miles d
d But as bad as it was d
d It was gone after a while d
Chorus here.
d You may think there's nothing to it d
d And the truth is hard to see d
d To be a man invisible d
d Is a remarkable thing to be d
d Thing to be d
Yeah!
All right!
That's so great.
It's coming along.
Thank you.
Hey, I'm glad
you put truth in your song, man.
That's important.
Hey, thanks, man.
So, who are you?
What do you mean?
Well, if we're, like, the man invisible,
what are you?
I don't know...
I'm an artist, I guess.
You know, there's life,
and then there's the people
watching the life, commenting on it.
Yeah, well, that's what I do, too.
What?
Comment. Say things. Think. Whatever.
Why are you so special?
Well, I didn't say I s special.
But it's one thing to think, you know,
and it's another thing
to actually communicate it to people.
You know what I mean?
I mean, if a tree falls in a forest
and no one hears it, does that make a sound?
Of course it does.
You know, that is my worst fear...
Making a sound and no one hears it.
Mine, too.
What? Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
You know what I'm saying.
Sure. You make art, and you want people to see it.
Wait. What happened to the tree?
Yeah, but that doesn't mean
that your tree is not artistic
if no one cuts it down.
Jeff likes to argue for the sake of arguing.
No, I don't.
Yes, you do.
No, I don't.
You do.
No, I don't!
Hi.
So, you, like, come from a town like this or...
Not really. I come from an area...
Bel Air.
You rich?
No, not really. Middle class.
Me, too. Middle class.
Maybe upper-middle class.
d See what's around you d
d Listen to their lies... d
So, like, your dad's a big deal, right?
He thinks he is.
Well, he is.
He is. He is. Yes.
He is. And you love him a lot.
He bought you a new BMW for your birthday,
but you finally had to...
Move out and get your own place.
I mean, you know, it's time to leave the nest.
Your parents hate your smoking.
You didn't tell 'em about the abortion.
All your friends got boob jobs.
You got the tattoo instead.
Subscribe to Vanity Fair.
Nice.
Personal trainer? Very nice.
d I sound like an idiot d
d Watching the parade d
d I know there's no tomorrow d
d Only the charade d
d I am dead d
d Deep inside d
d In my head d
d All the lies d
d There's no then d
d Only now d
d I will love d
d Show me how d
d I burned my hand in a fire d
d I haven't slept for a week d
d I cut my feet on the glass d
d Never finding what I seek d
d I need salvation d
d I need... d
Pony, if we wanted to hear you sing,
we would have gone to your concert.
Jeff!
So you sold 90,000 units.
So what?!
Does that mean you're a genius?
You're a great artist?
You're higher up the ladder?
You got an extra gold star on your... forehead?
You're cute when you're angry.
Why don't you write a song
about Sandra Bernhard's salad, ass...?
Jesus, Jeff!
Hey, man, look,
if you don't like my stuff,
I won't sing it, ok? I'm sorry, you know?
It's... no. That's not what I'm saying.
I'm saying I don't need a limousine
to know who I am, all right?
Right on! You know what?
He doesn't need the limo, man.
I mean, you know, at least I admit I don't know.
I know that things are up beyond belief,
and I know that I have nothing original to say
about any of it, all right?
I don't have an answer.
I don't have a... message.
Ok, great. Now he's crying. You guys happy?
Shut up, Tim. This isn't funny, man.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
No, no, no, no, no.
Hey, man.
You know, I'm really sorry
if I said something wrong. I...
No, man. Hey. No. You know what?
Hey, it's not you, man.
It's... you know what? You know what it is?
It's this tar pit of stupidity that we're all stuck in.
It's this cell. It's this void, you know?
No, man, look.
Look, you know, it's me, ok?
I come out here,
and I'm so used to everyone,
you know, kissing my ass,
and I think I'm a... star, man.
I'm really sorry if I'm full of attitude.
No, you know what? No, it's not you, man.
It's not anybody. It's me. Hey!
Look, man, it...
Why don't we get something to eat?
I mean...
Food?
We'd have to hurry.
China gate's open till midnight.
George can drive us.
There's plenty of room in the car.
Jeff?
No. You know what? You guys go ahead
and bring something back here. Yeah.
Well, why don't you come with us, man? I mean...
I want to hear about those songs you've been working on.
You, too, Buff.
Yeah! Limo ride!
Tim?
I didn't write any songs.
You guys go ahead.
I gotta stay here and guard the parking lot.
Come on.
No. No, no.
Come on. I'm not gonna go if you don't come.
No. I just don't feel like it, that's all.
Why don't you just try? Please? For me?
Come on.
No...
Hey, come on, man! Limo!
Hey, wait. Where's Bee-Bee?
Bee-Bee?
Bee-Bee, where'd you go?!
Did you guys see where she went?
Erica, you coming?
Are you sure?
Ok.
You got everything right but the car.
My dad didn't get me a BMW.
What'd he get you?
A Porsche.
Yeah.
So what about you?
What about me? I don't have a car.
You just seem to know all these things about me,
and I don't know anything about you, you know?
What kind of music do you like?
Military marching bands.
You think I'm rich and you hate me.
Now, how the hell would you know what I think?
You don't know me.
I'd like to.
Yeah?
You know, it was the biggest mistake of my life.
Really?
Well, I mean, you have to understand,
I was just this...
Dopey kid mopping floors
and kissing officer ass.
I mean, well, I enlisted right out of high school.
So...
I just wanted something different in my life.
"It's not a job, it's an adventure." Right?
I hated it. I had to get out.
So, I was working in the kitchen,
chopping lettuce,
you know, real heroic stuff,
and I had this big... knife,
and I chopped off the tip of my little finger,
and 3 days later, I was a free man.
You cut off your little finger?
Well, they...
They were nice enough to sew it back on.
Let's see.
Honorable discharge.
Disabled while serving.
I get a check every month.
4 for smoking, please.
Closed, closed.
Man, no closed, we just got here!
Midnight closed.
Come on. We're hungry. Please?
Yo, you know who this guy is right here?
That's Pony Moynihan from MTV.
Yeah, look at his limo out there.
TV?
TV. MTV.
What, you're gonna turn him away?
Hey, man.
No, man.
He's probably the most famous guy
to ever come in this place.
You're lucky he's here.
Yeah!
Takeout only.
Wait, I get picture!
Yeah, yeah.
Thanks. See, man?
You know, I remember coming in here
with my parents.
Really?
You know, I should make a video of this place.
You know, bring my camera in.
You make videos?
Yeah, all the time. That's what I do now.
You know what would be cool,
is, like, to do a music video, you know,
but, like, you know, have it set in here.
You know, like... like... Like with her and...
You know, like... You know, like...
"closed, closed, closed, closed."
But with your music.
You could do it.
I could.
Yeah!
Yeah.
I mean, do you have something
I could show my manager?
I mean, do you have a reel?
Yes. Yeah!
A reel?
I mean, what's there to be happy about, really?
Going to the gym, climbing the stairmaster,
eating the yogurt, checking the voice mail,
smoking the low-tar cigarettes,
shaving the bikini line.
Sometimes I just want something different, you know?
What was your name again?
Erica.
So, you think you and I are alike, Erica?
Deep down.
Way down.
It's a mistake to think that.
We could still talk... You know?
It's nice to talk.
It's nice to do a lot of things.
That's what I mean.
I'm not a nice guy.
I know. It's ok.
Yeah?
I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself.
If I didn't want to be here, I'd be in a limo right now
with a bunch of kids looking for Chinese food.
No, no, see, you... You don't know.
No? No.
So teach me a lesson.
Hey, when I get faced
I can get this huge appetite.
God.
I don't know why.
Most people don't, but I do.
You ok, man?
You ok?
I didn't want to eat this much, man.
Wait, I'll get you some air.
Wait, do the windows, ok? Just do 'em.
Yuck! Gross!
You done?
Yeah.
Drat!
Hey!
Hi.
Mrs. Douglas, I hope I'm not calling too late.
No, have you seen Bee-Bee? Well, no, yeah, she was.
I was just wondering if you'd seen her.
She did? Ok.
Yeah. No, I'm sorry to bother you, Mrs. Douglas.
Ok. Bye.
She always answers.
Hey! Hey, you guys!
No, no.
Put back the leprechaun. Put it back.
Go!
What are you doing, you idiot?!
Come on! Run!
Come on! Open the damn door!
Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Come on!
Go! Go! Go!
Yeah!
Man, don't go getting soft on me.
I mean... sorry. It's ok.
It's ok. Just don't think, ok?
Just don't think.
d Black and orange, black and orange d
d Hear that hearty yell d
d Rah rah rah d
d G... o... f... o... r... i... t d
d Go for it d
d Rah d d rah d
Hey, play that demo again, man.
All right.
I was never really into football, you know?
I gotta take a piss.
Do you mind if we pull over really quickly?
Yeah.
I'm sorry. No, no, no.
George, pull over.
Ass...
Burnfield.
No place like it.
Yeah. Burnfield, pizza and puke capital
of the world.
I can't believe you're still here.
I'm moving.
If...
No. I'm going.
Soon.
Yep.
What's that supposed to mean?
I don't know. I say what I mean.
Yeah, you think you're so smart.
That's because I am.
Hey.
It's ok.
This kind of thing happens.
It's just never happened to me.
I'm sorry.
It's true, though.
So...
What's your "TCB" tattoo stand for?
What's that about?
"Taking Care of Business."
I'm sorry.
I hate it here.
It's so ugly, it's like being dead.
You got out of here, you know?
I'm ready to go.
Yeah, but sometimes I try to figure out
why I left in the first place, you know?
I think about people, and...
And I wonder what they're doing.
Yeah.
And I think about you.
I mean... A lot.
Me?
Yeah, I have. I have, you know.
Yeah, you know, when you called,
I thought, there's a name from the past.
Or the future.
No, no, I mean...
I mean, we'll be working on that album cover, right?
Yeah, I know what you're saying.
You do?
Yeah.
God, you showed up
at such a weird time in my life.
I just walked all the way
from the westside to here.
I haven't walked that far since junior high.
I thought you didn't drink.
Don't anymore.
Can I have some?
Knock yourself out.
You know, one moment, things are so... Up,
and then you look at it
from a totally different angle,
and then it all makes sense.
Yeah.
Did you ever hear that saying,
"this too shall pass"?
Sure, all the time in group.
In group?
Rehab. Outpatient.
I have to go once a week.
It's kind of like A.A.
Yeah, you had to go to Highgate.
That must have been intense.
Intense.
How long were you in there?
90 days.
But now I just have to go once a week.
See, I'm rehabilitated.
Well, then, you shouldn't drink.
Are you gonna drink?
No.
Maybe...
That would suck
if you had to go back to rehab.
Yeah, it would suck big time.
I'd kill myself first.
It was pretty bad?
It was like hell with windows.
There was... On the walls,
kids my age sucking their thumbs.
I mean, every day, I would... I'd wake up in my cell,
and I'd think, my parents put me here?
Why? Why?
Because I stayed out all night one time.
Because I broke the VCR when I was drunk.
Because I was out of control.
I thought my parents loved me.
Hey, do you got any water?
And some B-1?
Hey, where'd everybody go?!
Hey, hey. Ok?
Sorry, Bruce.
We were all riding around...
And it suddenly hit me what we were doing.
We were getting off on the fact
that we're in a car
10 feet longer than all the rest.
And I got out and I just started walking.
Yeah.
Well, what it was...
And I didn't want to admit it,
but, you know...
I was jealous of Pony.
Well, sure. He's rich, and he's famous.
He's got everything, and you've got nothing.
Yeah, but... When I was walking...
I realized
that he's stuck in that limo
all the time.
He's stuck with the interviews.
He's stuck with the autographs.
He has to do whatever his manager
tells him to do, you know?
He's not free.
He's just part of the machine,
and if you think about it,
freedom's all that there really is.
Yeah, I guess.
You know, it used to scare me so much
that I didn't know what was coming
in my life.
You know, like,
I would always think...
You know, what if I make the wrong move?
But maybe there isn't any right move.
You know? I mean, look at us.
You know? We all dress the same.
We all talk the same.
We all... The same.
We all watch the same TV.
Nobody's really different,
even if they think they're different.
"Boy, look at my tattoo," you know?
And, see, that's what makes me free.
Because I can do anything I want,
as long as I don't care about the result.
Anything is possible.
It is night on planet Earth,
and I'm alive.
And someday, I'll be dead,
someday, I'll just be bones in a box,
but right now I'm not. And anything is possible.
And that's why I can go to New York with Sooze,
because each moment can just be what it is.
There's no failure. There's no mistake.
I just... i just go there and live there,
and what happens happens.
And so, right now, I'm getting naked,
and I'm not afraid. You know?
I don't... I don't need money, man.
I don't even need... I don't even need a future.
Like, I could knock out all my teeth with a hammer.
So what?
You know, I could poke my eyes out.
I'd still be alive, you know?
At least I'd know
that I was doing something real
for 2 or 3 seconds, you know?
It's all about fear.
And I'm not afraid anymore, man.
It!
Fear!
Bravo, you son of a bitch!
Is that Jeff?
My God.
Hey, Jeff?
Do you...
Do you ever wake up in the morning,
and you think, "well, here's another day."
You know?
It's just like the last one.
I mean, what difference does it make, you know?
You know, my mom has this saying.
Yeah?
"Don't write any checks you can't cash."
Really? What else does your mother say?
These days...
"Give me that bottle," mostly.
Hi. I thought you guys got lost.
Hey, where did you go?
We were worried about you.
Home, you know.
Yeah, I talked to your mom.
I think I woke her up.
I hope I didn't get you in trouble.
You didn't get me in trouble.
Hey, where's Erica?
I don't know.
Gee, Jeff,
I thought you were gonna go take a piss,
not join some alcoholic nudist colony.
No, no. I just...
I just got sick and tired
of listening to that demo tape
over and over again, you know?
I mean, I felt like
a... groupie, you know?
I enjoyed the ride. I'm sorry you didn't.
But wait, Sooze, no. I don't wanna fight.
I'm so sorry.
What?
No, I mean it. No, look,
when I got out of the car,
I walked all the way here,
and I... and I figured something out.
Yeah?
Yeah...
Hey!
On behalf of Burnfield,
I present to you the keys to the city!
So, how was the ride, kids?
Great.
Thrilling?
It was the nicest thing I've done in a long time.
That's nice for you.
Where's Erica?
You seen her?
Erica?
She said she was tired. She went back to the hotel.
How'd she get back?
I called Bucky's. I got her a cab.
Is there any hot mustard?
I'm gonna go to the car for a 'sec.
I'll be right back.
They are old. We are young.
They are fast. We are...
Just... off, ok? Off.
Wait, Sooze,
I have to talk to you, 'cause I...
God, you smell like whiskey.
No, no, I have to talk to you.
Is that a threat?
I ate a dog when I was in Thailand.
Tasted exactly like this sparerib.
Wait, wait.
No, I thought about New York.
Forget about New York, Jeff.
I don't want to talk about New York anymore.
There was this other place
where they served
live monkey brains. Swear to God.
You walk in, they bring the little monkey out,
shave its head, crack it open,
and you eat its brains while it's still alive.
I didn't go in, though,
'cause I didn't have any money,
and my mom has a saying...
"don't write any checks you can't cash."
Tim, what are you talking about?
Ask your girlfriend.
Well, I called Erica's beeper.
There's no answer.
So what are you, her pimp?
She said she might go get a drink first.
Well, I mean, she always answers her beeper.
Pal, she's a big girl, you know?
I'm sure she's all right.
Yeah? Well, what'd she say?
About what?
About where she went. I mean, what bar?
She didn't say.
Maybe she's at the bar at the hotel.
The bar at the hotel? She told you that?
What did she say exactly?
Well, dad,
she said she wanted to suck my...
Ok.
She said you might want to suck my ..., too.
Tim, why don't you shut the... up?
I think I gotta go.
See ya later.
What? Come on! You're not gonna suck my ...?
You, man.
I never did anything to you!
Ok, you know what?
Watch your... Language, all right?
Or I might have to.
Whatever.
Come on, Pony. I'm just kidding.
You rock stars are really sensitive?
You know, there's a life on the road?
Don't do that, man, ok?
Could you give me a ride?
Yes! Yeah, man, give her the ride.
The old Pony ride back to the hotel.
Tim, go throw up somewhere.
You know, man, it's none of your business
what I do, ok?
It's none of my business?
Yeah.
Ok. It's none of my business.
So, you're trying to...
My best friend's girlfriend,
that's none of my business.
What the... are you talking about?
Nobody's... anybody.
No, see, Neil,
if you're... with one of my friends,
then you're with me.
Don't do that.
What are you gonna do?
If you hit me,
my manager will slap an assault charge
on your ass faster than you can say A.A., ok?
Your manager?
Yeah, man, my manager and my lawyer.
Well, just, you know, have 'em call me.
You know where to find me, right?
Yeah, drunk on the corner, man.
Hey, why don't you buy another beer?
It's on me, ok?
Thanks, man.
I'll be in the car, ok?
Wait. Wait a minute, Sooze.
What are you doing?
I'm leaving.
Is that all right with you? Do I have your permission?
Maybe you want to think about it.
Where are you going?
For a ride.
Wait, away?
Yes, Jeff, away. Away, away, away.
To his hotel?
Jeff!
You know what? We could go to the...
So you can do an album cover?
I've run out of words.
Wait! What are you saying?
I don't know.
And I don't care that I don't know.
What... what about us?
What about us?
I'm moving away and you're staying here.
No, maybe not, though.
That's what I'm trying to say.
Maybe not?
You think that I'm with somebody else
and now it's maybe not?
No, no, no!
You're unbelievable!
Wait, no, I... look, Sooze, I figured something out.
You did? Good for you.
It, man!
It!
You know what? Go with him.
Just go with him.
In the limo!
Your covers and all that...
Bye, Jeff.
Go.
What?
Just go.
You really suck. You know that?
Just go.
To women.
They're all...
Let us not forget what Chenowsky said.
"The greatest men are the most alone."
And without suffering, Jeffrey,
you will never gain wisdom.
I'm not suffering.
You know, I don't give a...
Good.
That's good.
d She's the one I live for d
d I live alone, I live alone... d
d She's the one I live for d
d I live alone d
d She's the one I live for d
d I live alone, I live alone d
d I live alone, I live alone... d
You know, I... I realize something now, man.
It's no big deal.
You know, I'm not jealous of Pony or, you know...
I mean...
Yeah.
Yeah, no, you're right.
It's no big deal.
You know.
The guy probably has his arm around her right now.
Holding her close...
Nudging her titty with his elbow,
talking about the deep significance
of his music
while she looks up at him
with her big brown eyes.
In a few minutes,
they'll be back at the four seasons.
Have you ever...
You ever stayed in one of those places?
No.
Well...
It ain't no pup tent in the garage,
you know what I mean?
So they'll talk and talk.
They'll probably talk all night,
and, they'll decide
that they're gonna spend the night together,
right, but, you know,
they're gonna keep their underwear on,
and they're not gonna do anything.
By 6 A.M.,
and he's parking the pink Cadillac.
You know, there's really only one answer.
What?
Anarchy, my friend.
Know what I mean?
Yeah...
No, no. Say it like this:
'Em all, man!
Yes! You're learning, kid!
That's right! You're learning!
It's the man.
What's up, guys?
You know, just...
Admiring the scenery, you know?
This one. He causes all the trouble.
Been drinking again, Timmy boy?
You were a... lineman, and now you're a ...OP.
Yeah... me. I'm drunk.
Ok. Come on.
It's time to slow down.
Who's gonna slow me down?
You, you fat pig?
All right. Get in the car
before I have to embarrass you
in front of your friend.
Hey, Gary, how's the divorce coming?
Cuff him and stuff him.
Ok.
Inside. Ok.
Gonna go for a ride.
Ok, I'm gonna need to make a report here.
You wanna tell me what time all this started
and what exactly occurred?
He's drunk.
He caused problems. He was here earlier.
Hey, Jeff.
Yeah.
You gotta help me out, man.
I'm in trouble.
No. No, no, no.
This is no big deal, you know.
I can come down and get you out.
No. No. I'm not... I'm not talkin' about this.
I did a bad thing, Jeff.
What? What'd you do?
That chick Erica?
Well, what happened?
Well, you know, I took her out to the van, you know.
It was going all hot and heavy and...
She started hanging on me, you know?
Then she started crying.
"Tim, Tim. What's the matter? I love you.
Don't go."
And I was just... Looking at her stupid face
and her stupid eyes
and her stupid mouth,
and I was filled with disgust, man.
And I...
Man, I really...
What'd you do?
I hit her.
You hit her?
Man. Wait... wait a minute.
Why'd you hit her?
'Cause I was... up, man.
I just kept hitting her till she didn't move anymore.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
She's unconscious?
Go look, man.
Go look. Go see for yourself, if you got the guts.
You know, this...
What you're doing with your life.
I don't know.
You know, it's not for you.
You know?
You seem like a smart guy.
Yeah, well, thank you for the advice,
but you wouldn't understand what's going on with me.
It's very complicated?
That's right.
Complicated or not,
life moves on.
Erica?
Hey!
You look like...
You been home yet?
No.
No. All right, well, you know,
we need a hot cup of coffee. Hang on.
Hey.
I was up all night, too, man.
A long, long, long...
night.
Hi... Yeah. I'd like to report...
What?
No. Yeah, no. I'd like to report a crime.
No, I can't hold. I don't...
All right.
Hey.
Are you trying to get ahold of Sooze?
No.
All right.
God.
It's gonna be a beautiful day, man.
God.
10... 9...
8...7...
6...
5-4-3-2...
Yeah. Yeah. It's ok for you.
It's ok. Enjoy yourself.
Are you talking to me?
It's ok.
Glad it's ok.
I'll tell you what.
When I get my engineering degree
and I'm swimming in my swimming pool,
it'll be very... ok.
If you're talking to me,
could you make some sense,
'cause I don't speak Swahili.
In 2 more years, I'll have an engineering degree.
We'll sell the store.
We'll move away from Burnfield
and the store and you, standing here.
Good. See ya later.
You're a drunk...
And an idiot.
Your wife sucks my... every night,
swallows my ..., and loves it.
That's ok.
Yeah, it's ok. You know?
We have a saying back home.
"Either the salt is rotten
or the meat."
Yeah, well, you're not so smart, chief,
'cause I'm moving out to L.A.
That's nice.
They have many convenience stores there
for you to stand in front of.
Yeah.
Hey.
Get ahold of Sooze?
No. I wasn't trying.
She was at the four seasons last night, man,
but you shouldn't worry about that.
No, I'm not worried. I'm not worried.
'Cause life is too short, you know?
I'm not worried.
Good.
Buff...
I'm gonna tell you something,
and, you gotta...
You gotta... You gotta promise
not to tell anyone, all right?
Sure.
No, I... I mean... I mean no one.
Hey, you know me.
Buff, look at me for a second.
This is serious.
Yeah?
Last night...
Yeah, I should have stuck up for you, man.
I know. You're my friend.
She's your old lady. No.
I feel really bad about that.
But I was busy, you know?
Look, this is not about Sooze, all right?
Wait, wait, wait, wait.
She stayed at the four seasons
last night with Pony?
Yeah. We all stayed at the four seasons, man.
It was party time!
Hey. I hung out with Danny, Pony's manager,
a really nice guy.
We talked about the video.
They want a raw look, something fresh.
Danny said if I can capture the reality of Burnfield,
it'd make a great tape.
Ok, Buff, listen to me for a second, all right?
No, I know what you're gonna say.
I don't know anything about making a video,
but that's a plus, because since I'm just starting out,
I've got a fresh point of view,
and that's good for, you know,
marketing, demographics.
Buff, listen to me...
I'd do it for free, just for my reel.
Buff, can you listen to me for a second?
And guess who showed up.
Shut up!
Look, look, all right? Tim is in trouble.
I know, man.
You know?
Yeah, that's what I'm trying to tell you.
That chick Erica?
They're looking for her?
No, man. She showed up last night at the hotel.
We had this great time together.
I stayed in her room last night, man.
What can I say?
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
You saw Erica last night?
Yeah, I saw all of Erica last night, man.
Buff...
You gotta stop making... up.
It didn't happen.
Sure it did, man.
No, it didn't, Buff.
Wait.
Hey, man.
No ..., man.
Erica is in the van back there.
What?
I found this on the way back there.
She's in the van.
What's she doin' in the van?
Buff, she's dead.
She's dead?
Look, Tim confessed to me last night.
Tim killed Erica. Tim is a murderer.
Bull...
No, no. You know what? No. It's true.
That's bull... That's total, utter bull...
Really? You wanna go look?
Yeah, man. It's bull... look!
Let's go look, then!
Look!
Cock-a-doodle-doo! Good mornin'!
Hey.
I am so burnt out.
How did you get burnt out?
Playin' with somethin' really hot.
Yeah? Yeah.
My God. You found it.
Thank you so much.
You get your tape?
Yep.
Hey, so, listen, man.
I got to go show the tape to Danny at the hotel,
and if I get the gig,
Erica is gonna teach me how to surf in L.A.
I'll teach you how to surf
even if you don't get the gig.
I can come visit?
You better! Yes!
I will.
It's really nice to meet you, Jeff.
If you're ever in L.A.,
you should come by the offices.
I talked to Pony earlier.
He said he had a really nice time,
and he's really looking forward to reading
some of your songs.
Yeah, tell Pony to go... himself.
Ok, I'll do that.
Ok, hurry up.
Hey!
Get the heck in there!
Hey! Watch out! Hey!
Not dead! Definitely not dead!
Well... I guess not.
See, I wasn't makin' up, man.
Nope.
God. Tim lied to your ass, man.
The guy is sad.
Well, I gotta go,
but, listen, if I don't come back,
I'll send you a video of me surfing.
All right, man?
Get some rest. Go with the flow.
All right, Buff.
Hey, George.
Hey, man. Hey.
They let you out?
Yeah, of course they let me out.
Stupid chicken...
I gotta pay some class "C"
misdemeanor ticket.
So did I call it, or did I call it?
She spent the night, didn't she?
That sucks for you, pal.
You lied to me.
You want to know what your problem is, Jeff?
You want to believe so bad,
you'll buy anything.
It's true. Look at you.
You're gullible, and you're gutless.
No.
Nope. That's not the way it is at all.
No, I stayed up all night
trying to figure out how to protect my best friend.
Yeah. No, I was trying to come up with some lie
so that you wouldn't have to go to jail
for the rest of your life.
You did that for me?
Yes.
Well, you know, all I can say is...
You're a... Fool.
Why? Because I give a ...?
Because I care, I'm a... Fool?
Jeff, gimme a break.
You didn't even have the guts
to go look in the van, did you?
No. No. You know what? That!
No, you lied to me.
You lied to me because you're gutless.
You're a gutless, drunken loser.
I'm a loser...
And I'm drunk.
But I'm not gutless.
You know, and what are you doing here
in the first place, man?
He's just gonna call the cops again.
Good. Good. I hope he does.
The sun hasn't even come up, and you're drinking.
Hey, you saw that brown bitch point a gun
at me last night, man.
Did you think she was gonna use it?
I don't know.
You don't know? No.
Come on.
You don't think
that after they called the cops on me,
her and Mohammed had a nice laugh?
No.
No?
Well...
I disagree.
I think they did.
I think they probably went home last night
and, you know, kicked off their sandals
and had a nice laugh
about the drunk on the corner. You know?
Makes me sick.
What... what are you doing?
Look...
Tim, just go home.
All right? Just go home and sleep it off.
What am I supposed to sleep off?
My life?
You know, I'm supposed to go home and go to sleep,
and when I wake up, what'll I be, Jeff?
A pilot?
Maybe a Super Bowl quarterback?
Or, no, maybe a... rock star, right?
I don't think so, man.
Just go home, all right?
This is my home.
Why... why'd you start this
in the first place, man?
They never hurt you.
They never hurt me?
They hurt me every day with their attitude.
You know, like they even have a right.
Who the... do they think they are?
Let me tell you something.
I was born here, all right?
I'm an American...
And I'm owed something.
They took it from me.
They're just people, all right?
They got feelings, you know?
What about my feelings?
What about my... feelings?
These ass..., they come over here,
they know all the answers, right?
Well, they don't know...
Would you just put the gun down.
Just put it down.
What is this now?
Jeff, stay there.
He's got a gun.
Well, then, there, now.
Why don't you go inside and call the cops,
and I'll come in there and blow your... brains out.
Hey, why should I call the police?
They don't do any good.
Well, you gotta call your wife, then, you know,
'cause she kinda handles these heavy matters, anyway, right?
No. No, you see,
I don't have to call my wife.
Well...
What about this?
Go ahead, big man.
Camel jockey.
Why do you call me names?
I never hurt you. I'm only working here.
Yeah, yeah. That's the... problem.
No, wait! Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.
What is your name?
Look, why do you care?
Because maybe if we knew each other's names,
things wouldn't get like this.
My name's Jeff.
Ok, look. Nazeer. Ok?
Nazeer what?
Nazeer Chaldi.
Hey, why don't you see if he's hiring?
You know, get an application.
That... that's Indian?
Pakistani. Ok? We're from Pakistan.
All right, all right,
enough with the boy scout routine.
Just get out of my way. Please, please! Look.
Please!
Look, just get off my property.
What?
Look, get down off my property.
Why? What are you gonna do?
You gonna shoot me
for standing on your Trash can?
Get off my property!
Hey, you know what?
Go... yourself.
You! You know, I'll call the police!
Go ahead, man!
They love you just about as much as I do.
Tim, can we go? This is ridiculous.
Hey, ma! Look at me!
Top of the world, ma!
Get off my roof, you... drunk!
There you are, honey.
We were waiting for you. What happened?
Look, get down now, you... drunk!
You know what? Go ahead and shoot me!
Go ahead, Shoot me.
Come on.
Come on, man. Come on.
Get off my roof!
Jeff! Jeff, come up here!
Look, ok, come on, look. What are you doing?
Look, that's enough! My wife called the police.
They're coming.
Jeff!
Come up here!
Is that Bee-Bee?
Come on!
Look, look. You see?
They were drinking on the roof, and... what, what?
Is she drunk? Just take her home!
What are you saying?!
Ready?
What are you saying? Please!
You got her?
I hope you're happy.
This has nothing to do with me!
This... this drinking!
This has everything to do with you.
No, no! She went up by herself.
Therefore it's not my responsibility.
Hey, it's your roof.
It's your... problem.
They call.
Hi. There's an emergency
down at the Circle "A" on First Street.
Yeah. Ok.
You're... Now, pal!
Send an ambulance,
'cause I think it's an overdose or something.
Ok. Ok.
Jeff, they're coming. Just wait here.
I'm gonna go over to scuff's
and see if he's got his truck.
Listen, if she dies, you're gonna be so sorry
you ever showed your brown face in this town.
This has nothing to do with me!
She went up by herself!
You know I tell them over and over don't go on the roof!
Don't go on the roof!
How is she?
I don't know.
I think she's breathing.
Ok. Ok, look.
My wife called the police.
They're coming. It's not too late.
They'll come, they'll take care of her.
I'm going inside.
God.
You people are so stupid!
What's wrong with you?!
Throw it all away?
You throw it all away.