(Plaintive bagpipe solo)
(Man #1) 'It was only a rock.
A big lump of sandstone. You might pass right by it.
'But to us... it was a symbol of our freedom, of our independence.
'We all knew about it, of course.
'We learned as children how it was the Scottish Stone of Kings.
'But they took it from us.
'And as a nation, I suppose we'd forgotten about it.
'Time does that.
'It was history'.
Justice for Scotland. Support home rule.
Justice for Scotland.
Come to the meeting. Support home rule.
(Man #1) 'But I was young and full of passion for my country.
'And Scotland needed to reclaim its identity.
'It was time for the young to remind us of who we were
'and who we could be again'.
(THE REAL MCKENZIES: "Tae The Battle")
Sorry!
The world we know is changing fast, The walls are closing in
And now is the time to make a stand, Don't let the cowards win
We're beset by a common foe, Ye can hear the distant drums...
Come to the meeting.
(Man #2) With your support, with your names upon this covenant...
as absolute proof of our resolve,
we will plunge this message into the very heart of Westminster!
(Cheering)
Ian!
We, the people of Scotland,
declare our belief that reform in the constitution...
is necessary in order to secure good government.
With that end in view,
we solemnly enter this covenant.
We pledge ourselves...
in all loyalty to the crown...
to do everything in our power...
to secure for Scotland a parliament!
With adequate legislative authority...
in all Scottish affairs!
Scotland will not be ignored!
- Aye, let's see them ignore that. - Aye.
It's only been 5 years since the war, give them time.
Time? Time? They've had centuries!
How many promises have they broken? In 1707...
- Ancient history, mate. - That's Scottish history, our history!
- The oldest nation in Europe. - The oldest bloody nation in Europe!
You actually think Scotland can look after their own affairs?
- Certainly not if you have the vote. - All I'm saying is, give London a chance.
Here's the chance, right here. See what they do with it.
If Scotland's ever going to be a nation again...
Stop! Shut your stupid mouths.
There is no bloody nation.
There's nothing but wind and rain and mud and shit.
Look at that. What does that say?
"North Britain", see?
We're all British now!
Scotland's dead. It died in its sleep, and nobody even came to the funeral.
One for granddad.
- I'll give you a lift. - No, you'll kill me.
- I will not. - I heard you in there tonight.
You're an anarchist, a menace to society.
Thanks, I'll take it as a compliment! Come on.
All right.
- (Ian) You on? - Yep!
(Ian) Be careful, now. Here we go. Hop!
(Groaning)
(Laughing)
- Ah, I broke my bum! - (Ian) Ya-hoo!
- So, been to church recently? - Yes, Dad.
- How's the studies? Going well? - (Mutters)
- Speak up, please. - Aye, fine.
- Still thinking about law? - Aye, I'm not decided yet, but...
- Still with that covenant thing? - Aye.
Harris, please.
Look at him, he's not stupid.
- Instead of studying... - I am...
No, you're not. You're throwing your life away with that nationalist rubbish.
- I have pride in my country. - That's not the point.
Nobody could be prouder of Scotland than I am, and you know it.
- But you have to get on in life. - I know. I said I might try law.
When? You try this, you try that. When?
Sweetheart, he's only come home for the day, and Bill's here.
How are your studies, Bill?
Good, sir.
You're on to your second degree, aren't you?
- Aye, sir. - Still president of the students' union?
I'm not throwing my life away. If I see wrongs that need to be righted...
There's always something wrong. Let me tell you something, lad.
What's wrong is not out there.
What's wrong is in here.
This is a world for doers not for dreamers.
Try and make something of your life, son.
Here's those things.
If the trousers don't fit, bring them back, I'll make a pillow cover.
Aye, Mum.
- Remember your father gave you that. - Aye.
He doesn't mean to be harsh, Ian.
He had the same fire as you when he was young.
But the world's not easy. He's worked hard, made a good life for us all.
I know, Mum, I know.
He is proud of you, you know?
Aye, well, let him say so, then.
Thank you.
Ian... Bastards, eh?
- We'll get them next time. - Aye, right...
- They can't ignore us for ever. - Oh, can they not?
- (Bill) People are outraged. - No, they're not.
- How can you say that? - Because it's bullshit.
- Calm down. - It didn't even make the headlines!
- It's on the front page. - Come on, mate!
How can people not care about their own country?
People care. It's just...
- What? - they're busy!
(Knocking)
Look, mate, nobody cared more about the covenant than I did.
- Thought I'd find you here. - Ian's blown a fuse again.
- We'll get a pint, talk about it. - No more talk, all right? I'm serious.
- Someone's got to do something. - What are you going to do, then?
- Get an army, invade England? - Of course not.
What?
A symbol. We need a symbol, a gesture.
Something to wake these people up a bit.
- An act of revolution, a salt march. - A what?
You know, Gandhi marched across India protesting taxes on salt.
So you're Gandhi now?
Because, Bill, you know what we are, what Scottish people are?
We're ashamed. Ashamed of being Scottish.
Screw them, 'cause I'm not.
Oh, look. Wendy Wood.
She was a friend of my mum's.
(Bill) Are you out of your mind? It's in Westminster Abbey.
Right across from Parliament. It's protected!
It's not a souvenir. "I'll take a postcard, a tea towel and the Stone of Destiny".
Think of what it'll mean. It's the most powerful symbol...
That's not the point. They'll put you away.
You'll get twenty years. Might as well go for the crown jewels!
You'd never get away with it.
I might.
Let's say you pull it off. You get it out of the Abbey and back to Scotland.
- What will you do with it? - I've not thought about that.
That's up to the people of Scotland.
But if it doesn't raise them to their feet, then Scotland really is dead.
- It weighs a ton, you'll never lift it. - Aye, not by myself.
Oh, you evil man. I'm six months from my degree.
- I know. - A lovely position waiting.
And your crazy scheme offers me what? Destruction of everything I worked for.
Bill, all great schemes are crazy. That's what makes them great.
- We'll ruin our lives. - Probably, aye.
Prison, Ian.
Aye, maybe. But it's for Scotland.
I'm through with talk, Bill, I really am.
Now are you with me or not?
You bastard.
And a few more. Give us that Westminster Abbey one, would you?
- Statesman's Corner. - Statesman's...
Henry III, Edward I...
For you.
Here's the backdoor...
What do you have to do to get a drink around here?
- I've told you already. Just take a seat. - All right, I will.
Hey, hey!
Ya-hoo!
No, no, I don't think you're right, though. If this was you, how can that be?
And... up!
(Groaning)
(Laughing)
- Islip Chapel... under renovation. - That's right.
Edward I, Henry III, Edward the Confessor...
...Coronation Chair. - Yes!
'Talking about it was one thing.
'We Scots have always been good at talking.
'But I had to see what we were up against with my own eyes.
'Only then, would it be real to me.
'I was off to London'.
Hello. Did you want to join the tour?
Erm... no.
Is it all right if I just have a wee look about?
As long as you promise not to take anything.
(Man)... Henry Yevele incorporated the latest technological advancement
for the 14th century, the flying buttress.
With these, he was able to raise the roof to 101 feet.
And it remains to this day the highest roof in Britain
and the single leading cause of stiff necks among tourists.
Now, if you'll follow me, we'll go on to the cloisters...
- Nine pence, please. - Oh... sorry.
- It's... err... very nice. - Sorry?
The Abbey is so clean.
Must be a whole army of cleaners
in every night just... cleaning.
- Just once a week. - Oh, that's surprising.
I suppose the night watchman could always pick up a wee bit of rubbish.
Or men, depending on how many you have.
(Coins jangle)
The Coronation Chair and Stone, made in the reign of Edward I,
to house the Coronation Stone of the Scots brought here in 1296.
Note how the Stone is incorporated into the shelf beneath the seat.
When a king of England sits to crowned, he sits over the Stone of Destiny,
which makes him, by Scotland's own traditions, king of Scotland as well.
All without ever having to get his royal trousers dirty.
The original coronation was in 1066...
(Telephone rings)
- Hello? - (Ian) 'It's me'.
- Who? - Me.
Ah, Gandhi. I was wondering when you'd turn up.
I can't talk for long. Never know who may be listening.
- I've been to visit my auntie's house. - You what?
I said, I've been to my auntie's house for a visit.
I didn't know you'd relatives in London. Why didn't you go straight to the Abbey?
Listen, I'm telling you, I went to visit her house.
Oh, right!
Where are you, I can hardly hear you?
- I'm in a pub! Would you let me talk? - 'Sorry'.
I've had a good look at her new ring, with the diamond in it.
- Right. How's it look? - 'Lt's a lovely stone'.
But it looks heavier than we thought and the setting's tricky.
- Is it? - We may need another jeweler.
Right, we'll talk about it when you get back. What train are you on?
I'll be late. I'm going for another visit.
Back to your auntie's house?
She won't be home, but I'll go in the back.
OK. Well, I'll see you tomorrow, then.
Oh, and Ian, if you see your auntie,
ask her if she wants her panties back.
Writing a book?
No, I'm just doing a wee sketch.
Why? Don't they have any churches in Glasgow?
Move on, jock.
(Doorbell rings)
Mr. Hamilton, you're expected.
Just a moment, sir.
Ah, you're the young lad who wanted to see me. Mr. Hamilton.
Have a seat. Some tea?
- Please. Thank you. - Thank you Mrs. McQuarry.
A wonderful woman.
Been with the family since I was a boy. Still treats me like one.
- I've seen you before. - Err... covenant meetings.
That's right. You're quite keen, if I remember.
(Laughs nervously)
(Clears throat)
Is this... err?
- Can I talk? - I think so.
Because what I'm about to tell you is of the utmost secrecy.
If what we say here were to become known to others,
well, it could cause me and you and Scotland irreparable harm.
Well, I'm on the edge of my seat.
I'm going to Westminster Abbey,
and I'm going to bring back the Stone of Destiny.
- Of course, it's been tried before. - I know.
- Even considered it myself once. - I didn't know that.
We were going to sneak in, dressed like monks,
throw a cloak over the Stone and drag it out after Sunday service.
I was 16.
Your plan's a bit more sophisticated, I presume.
- Aye, I've got a couple of things... - No details.
I'm chairman of the Covenant Movement,
Rector of the University, I can't afford to take the risk.
- You have accomplices? - Aye.
- Done your research? - Of course.
And the plan, is it airtight?
- Will it succeed? - Aye, it will.
All right... what do you want from me?
Finances.
- How much? - Fifty.
Fifty?
That's... err...
That's a fair amount.
Still, nothing is impossible, I suppose. I... I could make arrangements.
You have a financial plan? A budget?
- Not really... - I'll need something.
- We need to hire a car. - Right.
Petrol, obviously, and meals. Fish and chips, and so on.
£50,000 for fish and chips?
No. Fifty.
Fifty?
You came to me for £50?
Aye, well...
We're students, we're broke.
Mrs. McQuarry!
Kindly show young Mr. Hamilton the way out.
I'm sorry if I inconvenienced you, sir. That was never my intent.
Thank you, ma'am. I'll find my own way.
Would you like me to clear the tea things up?
No. I mean, yes. Sorry, Mrs. McQuarry.
That's all right.
Nothing wrong with a man changing his mind now and then.
Mr. Hamilton!
We never met.
Here's the chair. 5:30, one of us slips into the back chapel.
My idea, so I claim the honor. At 6:30, the Abbey closes and I hide here.
Under renovation, tarps, ladders, it's perfect. I could be there all night.
Now, the night watchman finishes around midnight, 1:00.
I come out, screw the lock off the door and let you in.
Here's the brilliant part. I say we do it at Christmas.
All of London will be in the pubs at parties.
We'll come down on them when they're lying in drink, their minds unbuttoned.
What? What, Bill, what's wrong?
- I plan to go home for Christmas. - So cancel it.
I've got a committee meeting on 23rd.
Miss it.
- We should give this a bit more thought. - No. Why? What's the matter with you?
I've been thinking, Ian...
I'm so close to my degree,
and I've got such a great position waiting.
I mean, we could do 20 years for this.
Are you backing out?
We're getting married, Ian. Jen and me. Next spring.
I mean, this is my life we're talking about here.
I can't risk it.
Aye, aye. No, fine.
Forget it, Bill, I'll go myself. I don't need you.
I'm sorry, Ian.
I really am.
(Jazz orchestra plays "I've Got You Under My Skin")
Oh, hi.
(McCormick)... and this person asks, "Are we going to keep the monarchy?"
And this voice from the back shouts, "Aye, it's you! Long live King John!"
Excuse me a second. Mr. Hamilton, is it?
Yes, sir.
- How's things? - Aye... moving on.
Good.
One moment.
Jamie... I hear you're interested in joining the committee...
What would you like me to do?
(Clears throat)
- Excuse me, it's Kay, isn't it? - It might be.
- Ian Hamilton. - I know.
Nice to meet you. You dancing?
- You asking? - Aye, I might be.
I like the idea of teaching.
Working with children and helping them find their way in the world.
It must be the Highlander in you.
Only happy when you're tending the helpless or... battling the English.
Well, we're simple folk.
I like your necklace, by the way. Boyfriend?
No. From my father. Wonderful man. A crofter.
- Ah, a wee farm lass. - I grew up with the sheep.
And watching my father struggle every day trying to feed us.
Paying taxes to a government that knows as much about the Highlands
as they know about the moon.
What does he think of you now, his young Covenanter?
Don't know, he's dead. His ship was torpedoed in the war.
- I'm sorry to hear that. - Me, too.
By the way, why haven't you said hello before?
I sit right behind you in European History.
- Didn't know you wanted me to. - I didn't but that's no excuse.
- What's wrong? - What are you doing for the holidays?
Going home. You?
I'm going to London to bring back the Stone of Destiny.
I mean it.
You do, don't you?
And so did Wendy Wood and Bertie Gray.
Every Nationalist worth his salt has talked about it, but that's just talk.
I know.
Has it occurred to you there's a reason why it's never been done?
Look, I've... I've been to London.
I know I can do it.
- Would you come with me? - No.
If we fail, we'll be laughed at. Even Scotland. I couldn't bear that.
Nor could I, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't do it.
- Can I ask why you're doing this? - Ultimately, the glory of Scotland.
- Ouch! - What?
It's not as much about the glory of Scotland
as it is about the glory of Ian Hamilton.
There's no need to insult me. If you don't want to go...
I never said that. I just want to know the lay of the land.
- All right, then, why me? - For a start, you were recommended.
And let's be honest... you're perfect.
- Who'd suspect a wee lass like you? - Is that what you think of me?
- I don't know you... - No, you don't, do you?
First, the rules. Number one, the answer is no.
I'm going to London for the Stone.
Nothing extracurricular, if you follow my meaning.
- It'd not even crossed my mind. - Ouch, now you're insulting me.
- No, I... I didn't mean like that. - What did you mean?
I just... Look, I think you're a smasher. I just don't think of you in, like...
- I mean, I might if... - Stop talking. You're making it worse.
(Raucous laughter and screaming)
- Him. - Him?
(Screaming)
(Girl) Stop it!
Come on, we need a bit of muscle, don't we?
Come on.
(Ian) 'I didn't really know Gavin, but I'd seen him.
'An engineering student better known for his drinking than his studies.
'But Kay said if you got past that, he had a heart as big as Scotland'.
(Gavin) The Stone of Destiny? (Ian) 'She was right'.
Let's do it.
(Ian) 'On top of that, he was bloody strong! '
(THE NEW PORNOGRAPHERS: "Mutiny, I promise you")
Here's the mutiny I promised you
And here's the party it turned into
Here's the mutiny I promised you
And here's the moment it turned into
- So, tomorrow, then? - Aye, first light.
You know, the Scots have a history of being great debaters.
More often than not, that's as far as we get.
I've poured my whole heart and soul into the Covenant Movement.
It pains me to think maybe it wasn't enough. Cigarette?
Oh, you're out.
Ring me if you need help.
Don't worry, we won't.
That's quite the ego you have there.
Now remember, we're in your hands.
Christ, Gavin! What's that?
You're lucky to get anything. She runs, though.
Aye, but for how long?
- Who the hell is that? - That's Alan. He wants to help.
- You didn't tell him? - Well, he asked me.
You told him? How could you?
- He's not going to squeal, I know him. - I don't give a shit!
- How old is he? - 19, 20, what's the difference?
Look at him, he's... meek!
Well, he's here. That should count for something.
Look, he's just shy, that's all. I'll take full responsibility.
One mistake, he's on a train home. Ye cannae say fairer than that.
No...
Hi, I'm sorry, we can't use you.
- Yeah. Course. All right. - You'll have to forget you ever saw us.
(Sighs) Yeah, I understand.
Ian, he's got a car. And we could really use another car.
(Ian) 'We'd been thrown together, the four of us. Strangers, really.
'But we were amazed at how it felt like we'd known each other for years.
'Alan's shyness had obviously made him a good listener.
'Lt was like he'd been with us from the start'.
(Rousing orchestral music over dialogue)
Basically, two teams. I'll go with Gavin, Alan with Kay.
- I'll screw off the lock... - We go in, get the baby.
- Put it in your car. - Switch it to the Ford.
I get in Alan's car and put my foot down for Wales.
- But the Stone's in the Ford. - She's the decoy.
- In case anybody's seen your car. - Right...
- Then we drive the Stone to Scotland? - No.
That's the beautiful part. We drive it south.
- They'll expect us to go to Scotland. - Right.
We stash it somewhere, come back when the heat's off. Simple.
Aye. What could possibly go wrong?
(Giggling)
(Ian) Thank you.
Thanks.
(Gavin) Cheers.
Tomorrow's Christmas Eve. They'll be in their cups.
Bugger that. Excuse my French.
Why put off till tomorrow what we can do tonight?
He's right. It's not a bad idea. Why not do it tonight?
We've not slept. I mean, can we even think straight?
Thinking's overrated. Come on, are we men of talk or men of action?
We have to leave now. Check your times.
Twenty past three now.
- Well, I'll see you, I guess. - Depending on visiting hours in prison!
- Well, go on, now. - Aye, we should leave.
See you at the party.
- (Ian) Ow! - (Gavin) Hold still.
- Don't stick me with the damn thing! - Shut up, stop acting like a baby!
Will you stop moving? Lie back and think of Scotland!
That's it. Careful with this, 'cause this is the big one.
Oh... honestly!
Get that down. There, let's go have a look.
(Metallic clanging)
- You all right? - Aye.
- How do I look? - When is the blessed event, Mother?
And a merry Christmas to you, too, sir!
Can't wait to see the look on his face tomorrow morning. Ready?
You realize the moment I walk through that door,
my life will never be the same?
Right. Keep your eyes on Daddy.
- (Woman) Hello. - Hello.
- Are you here to take the tour? - Only if you're giving it, sweetheart.
Oh, no. I just hand out the educational literature.
Oh. Well, darling, by all means, educate me.
(Man)... and it remains to this day the highest roof in all of Britain
and the single leading cause of stiff necks among tourists.
Well, I'm afraid that's all for today, so if you'd like to follow me...
(Woman) The chapel is closing in five minutes!
Five minutes to closing!
(Door opens)
(Tools clang)
(Doors shut)
(Screams)
What the hell are you doing in 'ere?
- Why didn't you shout out? - Well, because of...
You're lucky I didn't hit you over the 'ead. I'm patrolling all night.
How old are you?
How... how old am I?
Hey... you all right?
Aye.
You look 'horrible.
Oh... making yourself comfortable.
All right, put 'em on.
Come on, don't take all night about it.
Right, son. Let's be 'avin' you.
Come on. Come on, come on.
There's a good lad. You can't spend a night in 'ere.
Come on.
Wait a minute.
Merry Christmas.
(Metal clangs)
- Christ! - Hey, shut up! What happened?
It just doesn't make any sense. We should've had half...
- He said he's patrolling all night. - Maybe not...
I got caught, didn't I? Why did he have to be so damn nice about it?
- He thought you were a vagrant. - It's bad luck. We try again tomorrow.
- We'll think of something. - Will we? Any brilliant ideas?
- Not that you'd listen anyway! - Stop it, both of you! We're all tired!
Do you remember Robert the Bruce, when he fought the English?
And the story of his spider?
Six times he watched her spin that web and six times she failed.
But she never gave up.
I think we should go back to the Abbey and look for spiders.
Spiders!
Mrs. McQuarry... I have some work to finish, so I'll be up for a bit.
You should get some sleep.
I have a bit to do myself.
Ian!
Ian, it's Kay! Hurry up! Hurry up, it's Kay!
(Gasping)
She's burning up.
Kay? Kay?
- I've got to get her to hospital. - They'll ask questions.
A doctor, then. Something!
(Indistinct Annoy announcements)
Oh, thank Christ.
- Where's Ian? - He's checking the schedules.
He wants to put Kay on the next train home.
Gavin...
I've been thinking. Maybe we should all be on it.
- Jesus Christ! - Well, look at us.
Our money's almost gone, we're half frozen and no sleep.
- It's a miracle we're not all in hospital. - You want to quit?
- No! - What are you saying?
I'm just saying, maybe we need to rethink it.
Get Kay home and regroup. The Stone's not going anywhere.
I cannae believe this. I stuck my neck out for you...
I'm just saying.
Next train to Glasgow's 11:25.
- What's the matter with you two? - Tell him, then.
- What? Tell me what? - Alan wants to quit.
No, I don't! I'm just saying maybe this is happening for a reason.
We're nearly half dead, and even if we weren't, we can't do it without Kay.
One of us has to stay with the car. That only leaves two to lift the Stone.
It's not possible, you've said it yourself, Ian. Maybe it's a sign.
Maybe we should just go home and make a new plan. Try again another day.
- Is that what you wanna do? - Yeah.
No.
No, I really don't know.
I can't think anymore.
All right.
- Will you talk to him? - Talk to him yourself!
You said you'd take full responsibility for him.
Aye, and I will. But answer me this: Is he wrong?
Could you for once in your life accept the possibility
that somebody other than you might be right?
All right. Come on.
Right, here's what we're going to do. We'll take a vote. A secret ballot.
'S' means stay, 'G' means we go home.
And if you vote to go, there's no shame in it, all right?
We can always live to try another day.
But I will say this.
If we go home. Lf...
Will we really ever come back?
Doesn't the lassie get to vote?
We didn't think you heard.
I'm just ill, I'm not dead.
"Stay".
Four "stays".
Excuse me, I wonder if you have any rooms available?
We've just come in from... Shrewsbury. And, err...
- That the missus? - Aye. Err, no, sorry, she's my sister.
Is she drunk? I won't have drunkards in my house.
No, she's not, she's just not feeling very well. She just needs to sleep.
- All right, come in. - Thank you.
Thanks for sticking up for me back there.
Sod off.
Gavin?
(Sighs)
Aye?
- Are you sorry you came? - Of course I am.
Nobody in their right mind would want to go through this.
Then why are you?
I'm mad, obviously.
No.
No, really, why?
Gavin Vernon, the mad bloke, opens beer bottles with his teeth.
And you want to prove to people that there's more than that?
Prove it to myself.
It's funny... I'm just the opposite. Being shy, you know?
Even when I was a wee boy, when people would look at me, I'd just...
...freeze up.
But I always wanted to be someone, you know? Have adventures.
- I just never though I'd have the nerve. - You think too much.
Be more like me. Just dive in. Something will come to you.
- Dive? - Aye.
What did you say to Ian, that day in Glasgow?
I told him if you messed up, I'd thump you and send you home.
Oh.
And I will, too.
Ian?
- Promise you'll come get me. - I swear.
I knew you'd try to get me into bed.
What are you thinking?
Just that it's not long to Christmas now.
I told my mum and dad I'd be with friends
and that I'd see them on Boxing Day.
My mum was so hurt.
I never meant to put you all through this.
Don't flatter yourself. We're here because we want to be.
Stop taking everything on yourself, Ian.
You're not the great high and mighty.
Just another boy with grand ideas... and a head like a concrete block.
And why do you want to push a rock up a hill by yourself?
Just let go a wee bit. Maybe people will like you more.
- You seem to like me fine. - No, I don't, I just put up with you.
If you go for the Stone without me, I'll break your arm.
(Ian) 'We were stuck. We needed a new plan.
'So back we went to look for spiders.
'Lt was Gavin's idea to draw someone out and grill him for information.
'Since the night watchman now knew my face, I let him try'.
(Mimics English accent) Magnificent architecture, isn't it?
It's smashing stonework, what?
You just don't see this sort of craftsmanship anymore, do you?
(English accent) No... no, you don't.
- I'm going. - What? G-Gavin!
Gavin?
Come on!
- Come on! - Gavin, wait for me!
(Rings bicycle bell)
Gavin, will you stop that!
Ah!
Come on!
Excuse me?
- Can I help you? - Oh, good afternoon, sir.
We were just passing by and remarking on what a masterful example
of ecclesiastical architecture this is.
Sebastian Fenster, School of Architecture, Whoreson College.
I've never heard of it.
I'm particularly impressed with the preservation of the woodwork.
To my eye, the carvers of the late Gothic period
far surpass anyone from the Jacobean or Tudor periods.
- I quite agree. - They've really stood the test of time.
And... such formidable doors. Oak, aren't they?
If it was up to me, we'd smash through these stained-glass windows.
That might be too noisy.
But the old codger told me the Poet's Corner door was replaced after the war.
Now that tells me it's made of pine, unlike this door here, here and here.
Made of oak, never get through that.
The strength of oak is 1200 psi. What's pine?
- 600. - Right, no problem.
The right tool, the right place, the right strength, we're through.
If we can't get through it with a crowbar, we'll use his head.
- Come here you! - (Alan) Gavin! Stop it! Put me down!
(Ian) 'And that was it, after all our planning,
'we'd decided on a good, old-fashioned Highland raid.
'But before that I had a promise to keep'.
- Who is it? - Hi, I've come to fetch my sister.
It's 2:00 in the morning!
Sorry. Our father's ill, we have to leave immediately.
- I'll send her out. - Actually, if I could just...
(Landlady) Get me the police. Yeah, those Scottish boys are back.
How should I know? They're up to something. Send someone right away.
Oh, Christ!
What's taking her?
Look, go and see again. Go on.
(Sirens wailing)
- Shit! - Hide it, hide it!
(Alan) Get it on. Get it on. Where's your coat?
(Detective) You two...
License, please, sir.
What's... what's wrong, sir?
Lady there says you told her you're from Shrewsbury.
Mr. Hamilton.
From Glasgow.
- Is this your car, sir? - Aye, it is.
Papers.
- Right, out! - Hold on a second, sir...
- If you'd just let me explain... - Thank you, sir!
What seems to be the trouble?
- Who are you? - I'm with them. Is something wrong?
This gentleman seems to think we stole the car.
That's silly. Where's Gavin? Hasn't he got the papers?
Err... aye. Gav... Our mate Gavin in the car there.
- How are you doing? All right? - Worlds better, thanks.
(Detective) You mind stepping out of the car, sir?
(Sighs heavily)
That road there leads you straight out of London.
Take it.
I heard her phone the police. I came straight down.
Four Scots, two cars, suspicious circumstances.
- They'll put two and two together. - Maybe not.
I didn't come here to freeze my arse off and go home with nothing.
It's 3:10. We've missed our time. We've no clue what we're walking into.
- Who cares? - I say we try anyway.
- And they've got our names. - They've also got our Stone!
- What about you? - Yeah, let's do it.
Aye, we might as well go down in flames.
- You all right? - I'm fine. Go.
(Gavin) Just cut it.
(Groaning)
(Gavin) Go, go!
- Higher. Try higher. - Give me some light here.
- (Ian) Come on. - To hell with it. Get back.
- (Bang reverberates) - Christ! Can you do that quietly?
- (Alan) Shut up! - (Giggling)
- (Alan) Gavin! - (Raucous laughter)
Will you be quiet? Come on, shush! Ian!
(Laughter and banging)
(Gasps)
(Gavin) Come on.
(Groaning)
(Wood creaks)
See? No problem.
Come on.
Give me that.
Right, take that.
- Gavin! - Hey... it's Christmas!
(Groaning)
OK, give me a hand.
(Wood creaks)
- Right, get behind it. Ready? Push. - One, two, three...
(Groaning)
- (Gavin) Come on, push it! Again! - One, two, three...
(Groaning)
Come on, one last push.
Three, two, one...
Ah! Put it down! Put it down!
(Resounding thud)
400-weight, my arse! That's more like six.
(Panting)
- Put it on the coat. - Right, brilliant. Come on, let's go.
OK, on three.
One, two, three...
(Gasping)
We've broken it! We've broken Scotland's luck...
Shut up! Shut up! No, we didn't. Look.
These edges are worn. This has been cracked for years.
Right, put it on the coat and let's get it to the car.
(Groans)
- Slide it under. Ready? - Yeah.
- Come on! - It's under.
Aye, I've got it. Let's go.
(Grunting)
(Engine revs)
(Grunts)
- It's broken. Get back into cover. - OK.
Come on. Hurry.
(Scraping)
(Gasps)
(Glass cracks)
Wait, wait!
Well, it's not as if they'll be needing it.
(Grunting)
(Scraping)
(Grunting)
- (Engine revving) - Shh!
(Revving)
What the hell's she doing?
Get back in...
A policeman's seen me. He's coming across the road.
What are we going to say?
(Tapping)
Sorry, officer... it's Christmas Eve.
Christmas Eve be damned! It's 4:00 in the morning.
Ah! Is it that time already?
- This the missus? - No, she's my sis... err... girlfriend.
You're parked on private property.
Why did you move when you saw me coming?
- We knew we shouldn't be here. - You should be on your way home!
Where'd he go?
To hell with it, we'll move it ourselves. Come on!
Ready? Push!
That's it, sir, we drove down for the holidays
and arrived here too late to get a bed, so...
We drove around and we ended up... here.
Oh, Lord!
Ah! That bastard, making us do the work!
Shut up and pull!
(Grunting)
- There's a car park along the road. - Oh, good.
Then again, you could always run us in and give us a bed in the cells.
(Grunting)
(Panting)
Police!
Well, you two best be running along, eh?
Aye.
(Engine starts up)
(Footsteps recede)
We've got part of the Stone. That's something.
- Take it somewhere safe. - I've a friend in the Midlands.
Great. Let's go.
(Grunting)
- Where's your coat? - It's under the Stone.
You'll catch your death.
I seem to have forgotten all my own rules.
Kay... you realize when we get home, we can't see each other?
I suppose.
It won't be safe.
Well, like I said, I don't really like you anyway.
(Mimics English accent) It's been a marvelous party, darling.
Thanks so awfully for inviting me.
Take this.
Oh, they're in my coat!
- Maybe he ran them in. - Aye, maybe.
- What do you think we should do? - I don't know.
- Think we could carry it? - Where? Into the street to catch a bus?
- You've not had any bright ideas! - With you jabbering on?
- I won't say another word! - Don't!
- I won't! - Good!
Fine!
That's it. Go and get the other car.
Oh, brilliant!
The keys are in his coat.
(Groaning)
Got it!
Come on. Let's go.
(Panting)
Gavin! Gavin?
Gavin? Alan?
Gavin? Gavin...
Gavin?
(Gasping)
- They're not in here! - What? Give me that.
He left them in the car. Please, God, he left them in the car!
Can we break in, hot-wire it?
Stand back.
(Police sirens)
Stop!
(Sirens wailing)
Oh, Christ, no.
(Sirens blaring)
That's it.
It's finished.
We'd better get out of here. Come on.
(Sirens approaching)
(Sirens recede)
Why would he have taken my coat?
The keys!
(Panting)
Fuck! Gavin? Alan?
Come on! Oh, damn it!
Damn it!
(Thud and glass cracks)
(Ian) 'I'd no clue what had happened to Gavin and Alan.
'My only thoughts were of the Stone.
'Someone once said a nation's soul lies in its people's keeping.
'And that morning, it felt like the soul of Scotland was in my hands alone'.
(Grunting)
(Brakes screech)
- You bloody maniac! - Gavin! Alan!
- Ian! - I've got it! I've got it!
Ha ha!
Yeah! Yeah! Ha ha!
We did it! We did it!
(Police sirens)
Get in, let's go.
Wait! Just one of you. It's too much weight.
- You go. I'll get the train back. - No, I...
Shut up! I'm fed up baby-sitting you, anyway.
Now, go on. Before I whack you one. Go on!
- Go on. - I'll see you back home, OK?
(Shouts)
(Whoops)
(Radio) 'Good morning. It's December 25th, Christmas morning
'and this is the BBC News.
'A break-in has been reported during the night at Westminster Abbey.
'Although details have not yet been made available,
'unconfirmed reports indicate that the Coronation Stone of Scotland... '
Mrs. McQuarry! Come listen to this!
'... the Stone of Scone, has been reported missing.
'There is speculation that its theft was a gesture of Scottish defiance... '
- We did it! We did it! - '... a rallying point for home rule'.
(Car horns beeping)
Listen!
'We will keep you up to date with the latest developments'.
(Car horns beeping)
(Cheering)
(Chuckles)
My God!
(THE REAL MCKENZIES: "Tae The Battle")
(Cheering)
Your hearts and souls are burning bright
We're headed for higher ground
So remember the creed, remember the cry
Remember the ancient way
And we'll be the ones dug in with the hounds
We've taken the highest ground...
(Bells pealing)
(McCormick) Hello?
(Ian) 'We've been to the nursery and got the baby'.
What? For God's sake, Ian, drop the code talk. Tell me what happened!
- It's a long story, but... - 'You're all over the news'.
- We are? Really? - 'Quite a kerfuffle.
'They're dancing in the streets. You've awakened something'.
'Oh, my God'.
Was one of you wearing a brown wristwatch?
- 'Aye... that was me'. - Well, look, best lay low for a while.
And better take the baby to his relatives or something.
- Don't worry, it's all worked out. - 'Good. Ian, one more thing'.
- Aye. - 'Congratulations, man.
- 'I never thought you could pull it off'. - That's funny. I never thought I couldn't.
(Laughs)
You all right?
Yeah.
Let's go.
(Background music over dialogue)
(Panting)
(Scottish reel)
To the Stone and them that took it!
(Cheering)
Ian, come on. Admit it, it was you, wasn't it?
Aye, it was me. I told you it was me.
Right! The only guy that suspects Ian Hamilton is Ian Hamilton!
(Cheering)
I don't understand. What has this got to do with you?
You did it?
Ian... have you any idea the trouble you've got yourself into?
Speak up.
Aye, Dad. I do.
I'm so proud of you, son.
I am so very proud of you.
(Mother gasps)
Oh!
- Oh! - Sorry, didn't mean to scare you.
Your landlady let us in.
What's going on?
I just spent the last 5 hours down at the police station.
Shit!
And they were asking me a lot about you.
I told them you spent Christmas with me.
(Sniggers)
That's last year.
Thanks, mate.
Aye.
There's something else.
My dad's a builder so he knows a lot about stone.
He said if the Stone's been dry for 600 years...
and moisture gets in now and freezes,
the whole thing could just disintegrate, nothing left.
We'll be shoveling it into paper bags.
We need to go and get it. Before we're all arrested.
Before there's no Stone left to get.
(Background music over dialogue)
What the hell is that?
Should we wait, see if they leave?
Is that it?
Aye.
- At least it's in one piece. - Might as well be back in the Abbey.
We... were just travelling through and we saw your fires...
Thought we'd see if we could have a bit of a warm.
Have a seat.
Expect you have a bit of trouble, now and then. From the police.
Some.
Well, that's because they don't like the way you live. You're free.
I think freedom's the most valuable thing that people can have.
Many would take that freedom from people they don't understand.
Like yourselves and... well... ourselves.
Our people, the Scots, have died for freedom over and over for centuries.
And we would again, too, gladly.
But for us to continue our fight, we need a symbol to unite our people.
We've not done anything wrong, although...
...what we have done is illegal.
But we've done the only thing we could.
We need that symbol of freedom so that the flame that burns in here...
can never be extinguished.
This symbol of yours...
...where is it?
It's under your arse.
(Laughs)
And it was under my arse!
(Laughter)
(Ian) Ready? Here we go.
(Gavin) Here we are.
Well done.
- (Bill) Good to see you. - (Gavin) Let's do it, then, eh?
Pull that off.
Just back...
Watch your feet. Alan... Alan!
(Grunting)
To the brave souls who brought the Stone home.
Wherever they may be.
May Scotland never forget them.
- Well done. - Thank you, John.
Thank you.
(Ian) 'I knew it was only a matter of time before I was arrested.
'And I longed for it.
'The excitement. The chance to have my say in court.
'But what really mattered was the Stone.
'We couldn't just let it disappear. Public sentiment would never allow it.
'I decided to put the Stone into the hands of the authorities.
'The next move would be theirs.
'Would they leave it in Scotland or take it back to London,
'to the outrage of an entire nation? '
- (Ian) And lift! - (Kay) I've got it. Good. Careful.
(Ian) 'We returned the Stone to the Church of Scotland...
'at the ruined Abbey of Arbroath,
'where the Estates of Scotland met to sign their Declaration of Independence'.
(Gavin) Mind your backs.
That's it, that's it.
You did it, Ian.
(Police sirens approach)
(Sirens wailing)
(Tires screech)
(Bagpipes play)
(Policeman) Stay calm. Let us do our jobs.
(Ian) 'The Stone was bundled back to London and I never saw it again'.
Are you the ones that took the Stone? Which one of you is the leader?
Speak to this man here.
- What's your name? - My name shouldn't matter.
Our readers want to know.
Tell them we're the children of Scotland.
Gavin!
'That day, I heard the voice of Scotland speak as loudly as it did in 1320.
"'As long as a hundred of us remain alive,
"'we shall never give in to the domination of the English".
"'We fight not for glory, nor for wealth nor honors,
"but only and alone for freedom,
"'which no good man surrenders but with his life".'